Cicada - You're such braggarts.  It's not such a big deal to be able to do the backstroke. Get the f**k over it.  The Golden Stone Fly

Cricket - You wasted so little time trying to get to second base.  For that, I love you and respect you.  Always yours, The Dragonfly

Dragonfly - Let's get lunch together tomorrow.  You can talk and I'll just sit there.  The Moth

Moth - I'm sorry but your name will no longer rhyme with Sloth or Cloth. Thank you.  The Ants

Golden Stone Fly - I wanted to tell you that your personality is bad but you're so good looking that I'd still do it with you. Love, Mayfly

Mayfly - You're finally home. So excited. Let's do something really destructive and tell everyone who gets mad at us to go to hell.  See you soon, Salmon Fly

Salmon Fly - I can't get you out of my mind.  I can't stop crying and I don't think it'll ever go away.  I hope you're miserable too.  You've ruined me, Tarantula Hawk

Tarantula Hawk - I'm so sick of you thinking you're in charge of everything. I hope you get the swine.  Just for a few days and then get better but still.  Love The Ants

The Ants - Mother May I take two steps forward.  Yes you may.  Mother May I take one step forward.  No you may not.  The Cockroach

Cockroach - Our love was slippery like rain but beautiful like rain too. Come back to me.  I'll lick your face.  Yours always, The Grasshopper

Grasshopper - Finally, everything has come full circle and you're stalking me.  Serves you right for screwing with my head.  I'll always love you but you can never have me.  Love, The House Fly

House Fly - I'm rubber, you're glue.  Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks on you except all the good things.   The Jolly Green Giant isn't Green Anymore.  Trixie Van Bottoms whores herself out to town.  Touch black, no trade back.  Sincerely, The Scorpion

Scorpion - I'd appreciate it if everyone could check out my new nose and let me know what you think but if you don't like it please only say so behind my back.  Thanks so much, The Wasp

Wasp - The fact that you wear fancy clothes doesn't make you the authority on everything.  Why don't you try to act a little nicer and see if that gets you laid?  Just a little advice.  Thanks.  The Beetles

Beetle - Hey Beetle.  It was great to see you as always but you look so dainty.  Do you have the swine?  Just checking in.  Your Friend, The Fire Fly

Firefly - Now that you and your girlfriend are broken up you mind if I try to get in with her?  Nothing long-term but I've always wanted to french her and she was always giving me that look even while you and her were B and G. Thanks, The House Fly

Fruit Fly - Wanna work out together tomorrow?  To be more direct, I just want to watch you work out tomorrow.  Thanks, The Long Horned Beetle

Long Horned Beetle - You didn't tell me you were going to dye your hair. You look so f**king awesome.  You should get a little botox too.  Everyone can use it.  Sincerely, The Roachfly

Spider -  I did it with your sister.  Sorry about it but I've always wanted to and I think we like each other.  Or, at least she likes me.  The Honeybee

Honeybee - I wanted to tell you something but it's a little bit sensitive. Do you want to meet for coffee?  It's about my wang.  Thanks.  The Cricket